I rolled over and the clock read 2:10AM. As I thought, “Seriously?” I realized that once again the back of my neck was sweaty…or do we say glistening for women? At any rate, here I was fighting my current every night battle of losing sleep at the hand of the H word – Hormones. Sorry, you male readers, if this makes you uncomfortable, but it’s a reality I’m living with of waking up throughout the night, glistening, crazy dreams – side note….I had a dream last week that I delivered Jessica Simpson’s baby and it was red and green with a spinning head. Obviously my own spinning head had made it’s way into my dream. I apologize, Jessica Simpson. Anyway, sleep has not been my friend lately. My waking up throughout the night is usually temporary and I go back to sleep within minutes. This was not the case last night, however. That 2:10AM clock later read 2:30AM and I lay there wide awake, so I just got up. I can now spew forth countless stories in the lives of celebrities as I am now caught up on all of of PEOPLE.com (don’t judge…I had to make sure Jessica Simpson’s pregnancy is going well!). As my husband later woke up at 5:30AM to go to Men’s Bible study, he asked how long I’d been awake, and I caught a whole “I really feel sorry for you” vibe coming from him when I told him I’d yet to fall back asleep. Let’s be honest, we should feel sorry for him because I know myself well enough to know that I am not always nice when I’m hormonal, lacking in sleep and delivering spinning headed babies. At any rate, I’m using a whole lot of words to tell you, “I’m sleepy.” I don’t have the time to be sleepy, though, and I’ll push through and hopefully make it to bed early.
As I read my Bible this morning, I read a very familiar passage for this time of year as we focus on events leading up to the death of Christ. It’s often tricky when reading a familiar passage to not just move on and say, “I’ve read this so many times before.” I’ll admit, the temptation was there to do so, but I never can get over the passages that lead up to Christ’s crucifixion. They penetrate my heart and remind me of how dire my need was for a Savior. As I read Jesus’ plea to Peter and the two sons of Zebedee to keep vigil with him because the gravity of what was about to happen was so crushing to him, the pace of my own heart quickened as I thought about how heavy of a burden this was for Him. As He went away to pray, He did so with such fervor, returning to ask if Peter couldn’t stick it out with him a little longer, as all of them obviously couldn’t hold on? A second time, He went to pray, returning again to find them asleep, only to let them sleep on, and returned a third time to pray. After the third time, He found them asleep and asked them, “Are you going to sleep on?” In a time of fear, when the weight of the world was on His shoulders, the disciples slept on, too overcome by wanting sleep. Oh, how I can relate to both Jesus and the sleepers. Last night, I got a taste of what Jesus must have felt when He surely had to be so tired, but the impending nature of what was to happen overtook any desire to sleep. For me, however, I didn’t want to be like Jesus last night. I wanted to be like the disciples and just sleep on, if I’m being honestt. I like the fact that sleep takes you out of having to think, to make a decision, and just allows you to remove yourself for 8 hours. For Jesus, however, he wanted the support and prayers of his disciples. He needed them, so to speak, to be the lifters of His arms. How like the disciples we are…like, ALL OF THE TIME! We sleep on, only to become alert when things get rough…like later, when Judas comes to betray Christ – the disciples got really alert then! But, really, let’s be honest, we’re pretty “gotta light a fire under our butt” kind of people. We’ll just sleep on until tragedy strikes our family, or financial times seems more dire, or we’ve allowed ourselves to reach rock bottom…and then, we need Him…we want Him. As Christ-followers, we may want to sleep on, but there is a world waiting for us to WAKE UP and be real…to be the answer, instead of contributing to the problem. There is a people that are waiting for us to say, “We know Somebody that can help you.” Have you woken up enough lately to see how God is working around you? For us, at LifeSong, we are seeing a group of people WAKE UP and love our community in such a way that it’s people are, in turn, awakening to a message of hope, love and grace. Are you somebody that needs to know a Somebody that has the Answer? Have you been, like me, struggling to just wanna sleep on and miss what Jesus can do through us and in us? Let me invite you to visit us at LifeSong Church this weekend for 5 services – Saturday, 5:30pm or 7pm AND Sunday, 8:30am, 10am and 11:30am. There, I can promise you, the people will be alert and the amazing gift Jesus gave us through His death will be celebrated. So, catch up on your sleep, cause you don’t want to miss being a part of our new series, “Rock the House”. Can’t wait to see you there!