I think we are back into a rhythm around here. After a great break this summer, I think I’m ready to write again, to have a schedule again and let myself be open to new things and new challenges. I literally shut my mind down this summer…and LOVED it…for the most part!
Our 5 year old, Quinn…well, she might be having some issues with a new schedule. She started K5 this year and spends her entire day at SCHOOL!!! She has been less than enthusiastic most days simply because she is tired and ornery when she gets in the car everyday. A couple of days ago she asked me, “Mom, I wanna ask you somethin’. Did you sign me up for PE, Art and Music?” I explained to her that every child in elementary school has to take those extras, to which she replied, “Well, I don’t like it! You see, Mom (yes, she really speaks this way), PE is just so ‘run-i-ful’, Art is so colorful and Music is just so…just so MUSICAL!” Props to her for the new word ‘run-i-ful’ and double props for being the kind of girl that says just what’s on her mind. I like that about her – never wondering what she thinks. I also like the fact that God so often uses her to speak to my heart.
I’ve been a lot like Quinn these past few months. The way I’ve felt has not been new to me. I feel this way in different seasons of my life, but this time may have consumed a lot more of my time. You see, I’ve just been having a case of the blahs with everything I’ve signed myself up to do, so to speak. I have had a case of the blahs about just living life in general. While my summer break was so good to allow my mind to be turned off, I crossed the line from rest to apathy. I didn’t want to think. I didn’t want to do. I didn’t want to be bothered. I just wanted to hide in a cave and be by myself. It’s often funny (that’s totally sarcastic) that I look around and see most people can get away with hibernating from life for a while, but for me, sometimes it seems a little different. Having grown up in ministry leadership all of my life, I’ve become accustomed to knowing there are certain expectations on me as the wife of a pastor. I’ve also become pretty good at weeding out what is realistic and what is not. For example, there’s an expectation that I should speak first if/when I see people out and about. Truth is, I don’t always see people, but I certainly have heard after effects of not being the first one to approach. Great example of unrealistic. It’s humanly impossible to be all things to all people. Great example of being realistic, though, is being an encouragement to those God puts in my path. Sometimes I miss the opportunity, but realistically, I sure can be an encouragement to everyone I meet by just smiling, waving, a pat on the back and in the words I speak to them. Both situations very similar, but one reflects expectations and one represents a state of just being who you are. Both situations also reflect things we don’t even always want to do, but have to do. That’s my life, but I imagine yours is not so different. There’s a lot of life that we just don’t want to live, and a whole lot of expectations we can’t fulfill, but just like Quinn, sometimes we got to do what we got to do. Even in Quinn’s disdain for PE, ART and Music, she still comes home and puts a pretty good spin on it. After all, those classes are so ‘run-i-ful, colorful and musical. That’s not so bad. Even this morning, she was so excited to find out what she would make in Art today. I don’t want to do anymore laundry today, or mop the floor for the second time this week because Avery spilled tea (again), and I really don’t want to clean toilets. If I had to put a Quinn-ism to my day, I’d say those things are so dirt-i-ful, sticky-ful and YUCK-i-ful! Let me tell you, though, this new life and schedule has taught me a lot. I get up everyday now and have zero to very limited time on the computer (a huge distraction for me) and I get to work. Just this week I had two loads of laundry done, sheets changed, floor mopped (for the first time), dishwasher loaded and running all before arriving to work at the office by 8:30. Accomplishing that, for me, took a renewed focus and a BIG attitude adjustment. So, like Quinn, we have to make the best out of a lot of situations of life. What’s going on in your life that would change if your attitude change? Do you need to know today that what you do DOES make a difference? Let me be the first to tell you that ALL you do matters! From the smile you give to the cashier at the store, to the giving up part of your paycheck to bless another, it does matter. And, to answer the question I posed in my blog title, “Do I have to do that”…well, no, you don’t have to do a thing you don’t want to do, but why would you not want to TRY? Challenge yourself today to be more, do more and make more of life than you ever imagined!