The Pursuit

12190617_10153205982511914_36125211_oThese words have stuck with me ever since I heard them yesterday. “If you stop pursuing anything, it will break down.” Literally “anything” will break when left unattended. While this statement was in regard to marriage, the pastor also pointed out that there’s a #1 priority in marriage, and it’s NOT your spouse. Our relationship with God often goes unattended in the midst of human relationships. For me, I sought God harder and more intentionally while pursuing my future spouse. I wanted to know Him more and trust Him more to lead me, and when He led me to the “one,” these last 20+ years haven’t been highlighted by a consistent pursuit of God for me. Embarrassing to admit? It used to be. Expectations of others as the minister’s wife, the pastor’s kid, the missionary’s kid, to be perfect hanged over my head for so long. I would’ve NEVER admitted I struggled A LOT to carve out time for God. When children came along, playing the comparison game with other moms who seemed to have their whole spiritual life together became a place of me ending everyday in failure. “If you were a good Christ follower, you would spend and hour in the morning in prayer and an hour in Bible study.” I couldn’t even manage to get my hair brushed everyday, much less stay awake to pray! I’m still on a learning curve with how I can carve out quality time with God. In my pursuit of Him, “quantity” had to be taken out of my vocabulary and replaced with intentionality. One of my favorite verses, and my family’s life verse growing up, is Psalm 37:4. “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” This brought peace to this busy, tired, live in the car mom I’ve become. I had to begin to wake everyday longing for Him…desiring Him. I made a decision to wake up earlier each day to spend time with Him before the house awoke. For this “so not a morning person,” this requires a strong cup of coffee and extra focus. The reward has been a sweeter way to start the day, and I’ve seen His hand holding mine in the chaos of a day in this family of 6. Priorities can get so skewed.Which change can you make today to redirect? Be intentional today to take the first step.

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